Same Siders

Today I feel like going off on "same siders" at restaurants. You know these couples. They're the ones who can't stand the thought of dining three feet away from each other. They feel compelled to sit on the same side of the table or booth so they can cuddle while they eat. These are the same people who ride right up next to each other in pick-up trucks. Hell, they also probably saw the "Love Toilet" skit on SNL and thought it was a good idea. Please stop doing this- you're making the rest of nauseous while we're trying to eat.