Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Time to join the rest of us.


Dear restaurant owner-

I believe it's time to do away with something that should've been taken care of years ago- the glass ketchup bottle. For years your patrons have been shaking, banging and beating these goddamn things in hopes of creating just a little pile of ketchup on our plates. Instead, we inevitably end up with bruised hands, stained shirts and bitchy attitudes. Guess what? Plastic squeeze bottles have been in use by the general public for years now. Don't tell me that the reason you stick with the dinosaur bottles is because they can be re-filled. The last time I checked, squeeze bottles have tops that unscrew. So do us all a favor and get rid of these damn things. Thank you.

John Q. Public

3 comments:

Vickie said...

Admit it. You're just too lazy to shake the catsup bottle. You prefer to squeeeeeezzzze it, don't you?
And the poot noises squeeze bottles make.
Don't you?
DON'T YOU!?

Susan said...

In many states it is illegal to refill or "marry" ketchup bottles. In other states, it should be.

Billie said...

It is SO obvious to me that you have never waited tables, and don't know a lot of the laws about food service.

Wait tables for a few weeks, and THEN whine about this stupid, petty shit, ok?