No Sir!

My parents raised me right, no matter how much of a little shit I might have been. Among the many things they instilled in me was to always say "Yes sir/ma'am" and "No sir/ma'am". Failing to do so would result in my mother digging her long finger nails into the flesh of my upper arm - and she wasn't satisfied unless she drew blood. I must say that it certainly worked. But if the statue of limitations hadn't already expired, I'd report her ass to DHR. In fact, even to this day there are times when I catch myself saying "Sir" and "Ma'am" to my parents' friends and other older folks.

However, I've long since reached the age where young folks call me "Sir" and whenever I hear it, I picture myself wearing a white undershirt and long shorts with dark socks while carrying a metal detector. Being reminded that you're getting old is by no means pleasant. I respect the fact that my friends are trying to teach manners to their kids just like my parents did, but I'll be damned if I actually want to hear that word directed toward me. It's one thing to have a small child call you "Sir", but I had a twenty-something say "Yes Sir" to me yesterday. Please kids, call me "Old Dude" or "Pops" - just don't call me "sir".