I played a lame gig the other night and everything was going along as planned- it was beginning to wind down and it looked like we'd be getting out of there early. Then lo and behold, some bitch had to get out on the dance floor and start the electric slide.
"Do you guys know anything upbeat that we can to the electric slide to?" Lady, we're an acoustic act. Anyhow, she succeeded in recruiting enough folks to attempt to follow along with this banal party ritual.
What is it with white people that they feel the need to embarrass themselves on the dance floor? And don't get me started on country line dancing. First of all, as the prophet George Carlin once said, white people have no business dancing whatsoever. There's a reason why Auburn University offers a degree in Poultry Science- to keep white folks off the dance floor and tending to activities that better suit them. Fellow Caucasians, let's try to keep our collective eye on the ball. Mm'k?
Posts
3 comments:
Ok, first of all, I don't even know *what* the Electric Slide is, I've concluded it's a dance or sorts, yes?
I remember once I went to Joe's Crapshack during the weekend. Out of nowhere white people, young and old, began to rise from their seats and collectively move towards the large clear floor. To Dance!!!! I turned and saw a young black couple at the table next to mine. Their faces conveyed the horror, and as the white people began to dance to the theme song of Grease, I gave that couple a look, as if to say, ''They're beyond our reach, we just *can't* help them.''. In that moment, I found allies. It's something no one of ethnicity should have to witness alone. I'm sure they still carry the burden of memory of that frightful night, that's a fate no one should have to life.
I used to know "The Electric Slide"....back in the mid-90's.
AND "The Macarena" dance.
AND how to "Two-Step" (when I was dragged against my will into country dance clubs, ugh!)
Someone needs to tell these people that it's "Time to move on, folks!" They were probably drunk.
No one with any sense gets on a dance floor and does "The Bump" any more either, OR "The Pretzel" OR "The Toga Dance" (all '70's dances).
ooooo poor you getting paid to entertain white folks. if they embarass you so bad, advertise on 95.7 fm. i bet those folks are just dieing to shell out big buck for 80's white music.
Post a Comment